G-mail, Schmee-mail: Precisely zero interest. Got the offer -- on accounta I got this groovy blog, I suppose -- but I care not. Hotmail and Yahoo matched services within an acceptable window. And how great can the front end be?

Your "cool club" comment sums it up. Scarcity in dogshit would result, I think, in a coprophagy trend among the tragically hip. Look on your package of cling wrap or aluminum foil. See that little message? "Warning: Cutting edge is dangerous. Avoid contact."

Good advice in general.