Why? Do I get frequent flyer miles?: Been to a restaurant lately (and for Eno, Chuck E. Cheese doesn't count), where the waitron asks you "Have you dined with us before?" I have to bite my tongue each time from responding: "Well, just tell me if it works any differently from me looking at menu, telling you what I want, you bring it, I eat it, I pay, I leave. If not, then I'm good." Of course, I prefer no saliva in my soup (other than my own) so I keep my trap shut.

Still, I keep waiting for a revolutionary concept in the restaurant business that would indeed require a set of detailed instructions before dining. Like: "One of your meals will be poisonous. You should know this before digging in. Bon appetit!"