FauxPolitik

Thursday, March 25, 2004

Guest of Honor: In light of Israel's declaration that the new Hamas leader, Abdulaziz al-Rantisi, is among their priority targets, picture if you will, a phone conversation between Yassir Arafat (YA) and al-Rantisi (AaR):

YA: Hello?

AaR: Yes, Yassir? This is Abdulaziz. What is going on my brutha?

YA: Oh (pause) yes, yes. Abdul...wonderful to hear from you. (muffled mutterings) Ummmm, how are things?

AaR: Well, Yas, as saddened as we all are by the Sheik's untimely death cauaed by the Zionist infidels, we thought it might be nice to have a little party...you know for morale. I want you to be my most honored guest. You shall sit right next to me during the whole event!

YA: Well...(barely audible whispering to someone in room - "He says he wants me to come to his party...yes...and sit next to him!") Ahh, yes this is indeed an honor, Allah be praised, but wouldn't you know it it...uh, hold on (more murmurings)...it's just that I have this awful...very painful...crick in my neck, you see.

AaR: A crick?

YA: Yes a crick, well it may be some nerve damage for all I know and uhh...(what? ... oh, yes, yes...I forgot) oh and you know of course, the real, real problem I have is the house arrest. I mean, the crick is something I could overcome, but the Zionists have me locked in here soooo...

AaR: Well, I see, yes, I forgot about this. Well, there is no reason why we can't have the party over there. I will come over ... yes, I will just walk down the main road and into your compound, you see. Once we meet, I shall embrace you as the true brother in arms that you are....uhh, hello....hello?

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