FauxPolitik

Thursday, August 14, 2003

Kerry [he's no] Whiz: Well, I suppose you could forgive the candidate for not knowing that "we ain't got no stinkin' swiss cheese heeh" but would it have killed his staff to have sent one advance person to scope out the menu ahead of time? They don't have one local guy who could have told Kerry to saunter up to the window and say: "Provolone, wit" (that's a steak with provolone and onions), and then - you don't effin sit down to eat it! You stand up, legs spread, lean forward and start taking bites while you let the "junk" (i.e. greese, cheese, onions) fall where it may. I don't blame him on the Whiz however, I don't touch the stuff, but then again, I'm not a native Philadelphian. I've only lived here a total of 17 years. I tell ya, Clinton never had these problems.

UPDATE: Based on a closer examination of the picture, Kerry is clearly eating what is known as a "Cheesesteak Hoagie" or a cheesesteak with lettuce and tomato. It's not unheard of, but for an out-of-towner, it's a clear indicator of someone trying to mask the true essence of a cheesesteak - or he figured that a "grinder" requires lettuce and tomato. Either way, he's clueless. He was eating at Pat's, which is considered the "original", although that place has an interesting back-story which makes its lineage less than clear. As a matter of personal preference, I prefer Geno's (which doesn't have a website). The best is that these two bitter rivals are right across the street from eachother.

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